Google Groups Subscribe to The Spin Cycle
Email:
Browse Archives at groups.google.com.au

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Spiritual Renewal, or The Hazards Of Isolation

Herman is no stranger to us here at The Spin Cycle. He joined the forums of AIDSmeds.com in July of this year. Slowly at first he began to open up and reveal a life ravaged by the toll of dealing with HIV since his diagnosis in 1987. We have since learned of the tragic loss of a life partner in the 1990s, his eventual cessation of work (he worked for an airline as a flight attendant for many years) and his steady withdrawl from society. As Herman became more isolated, his sense of self-worth crumbled and he descended into a deadening clinical depression.

When Hermie first responded to my post about cocksucking, all I really knew about him was that he was a long-term survivor and that he lived in Belgium, so I responded to his comment in French, more as lark than anything else. This little bit of flirty banter blossomed into a friendship that deepened with each private message and comment retort. I learned that "mon petit chou fou" is actually Dutch and that French is just one of his many languages. Being non-native Francophones, we were much more forgiving of the inevitable little missteps in grammer and spelling than someone actually born within sneering distance of the Palais Garnier. French has become our little code, and somewhere between the "coo-coos" and the "bisous" our intimate cyberrapport grew into a serious case of fraternal love.

When my computer was wiped out by a power surge cause by Hurricaine Katrina, Hermie was one of the few folks (aside from my beloved blogmates MtD and Ronnita) with whom I maintained active communication. I simply couldn't bear a break in the conversation. Make no mistake: Hermie supports me at least as much as anything I might do for him. We are fellow travellers along a road that has been extended far beyond the points where our lifelong friends and lovers had taken their exits.

There was a gathering of AIDSmeds forum members in Toronto last weekend in conjunction with a memorial service for those who have already fallen to AIDS. I was unable to attend, but Hermie made it, and it changed his life. Years of isolation and depression flaked off like a serpent's dead skin, exposing a raw, fresh surface underneath. Understanding both the profoundity of what had occurred and the fragility of his current state, I felt a deep sense of obligation to help my dear friend process his experiences as fully and permanently as possible.

I approached my Covenmates and proposed that Hermie publish his thoughts on how the gathering had changed him. We post individually but with a common voice and perspective, and all new ideas are vetted thoroughly in regular meetings. We are a team and as such vote on everything, reaching a unanimous agreement before spreading our brand of anarchy and absinthe to you, our loyal (if occasionally one-handed) readers. It was agreed that Hermie would e-mail me his post and that I would publish it, with edits and addenda as I saw fit.

I present our first guestblogger, Herman, and his post in its entirety:


Picture me 3 weeks ago: suffering from a serious burnout, barely hanging on to life, diagnosed with clinical depression. This is when I decided to take what it needed and prepared for the Toronto gathering. Intuition it was that made me follow my guides to an unknown place and cyber friends, not knowing what to expect. I knew this meeting had the potential of changing my life. Today I know it definitely did.

Annie was the first I ran into. What a thrill to finally see an avatar come to life. Two hearts, two energies, two souls, hurt by HIV finally were united. The immense warmth, the overwhelming energy, the incredible feeling of acceptance, the purest form of spiritual love, it all was happening at once.

A cyber partner had become one of flesh and blood.

As the day went by more encounters took place. There was wonderful Rab, eccentric Joe and Stephen and more to come. Between the first rattling of words, came long pauses of hugging, of crying, of joy and shared grief. Finally our dream had turned into a bright reality.

Barely could I await sunrise on Thursday.
A day that would bring more avatars alive.
A day that would change my life for ever.

One by one, soul by soul, these wonderful people walked into my life, just like that, all bringing their own story, background and dreams. The bonds were made and forged, and that is forever, the power of them feeling strong like concrete.

Our first night together proved to be all but about HIV. These caring, loving souls shared so much energy, so much humour, so much will to live with me that in no time my energy was raised to levels I never would have dreamed of reaching again.

Paying tribute to those taken from us by the virus bonded us even more. Every member posted a ribbon with the name of a beloved departed friend, lover or relative on the wall of the less fortunate. I myself was glad to finally be able to release most of the tension, of my grief, of my uncountable days of sadness and cry my soul out.

Came two more days of sharing, talking, hugging, laughing, crying, and above all of building a huge glowing ball of positive energy.

This meeting was, as Rab put it so accurately, not about where we came from, whether we were rich or poor, nor about our past battles. This gathering was about being positive, about sharing, about able to say:
It is ok, I understand, I am positive too.
The phenomenal healing power that resulted from this meeting will be carried out to all corners of the universe.
We have become soul mates on a journey that will never end. And as death us parts our spirits will go on; these bonds are forever.

With love and gratitude,

Herman

Hermie, cheri-

I honor your epiphany. Hold on to the strength and grace that you found in Canada and build a new sense of empowerment. We love you unconditionally and are one with you in your struggle against despair.


IN SOLIDARITY!
B

10 Comments:

At Thu Sep 15, 05:52:00 PM GMT+10, Blogger David Peavy said...

Herman...You gave me chill bumps and make me wanna cry. God how wonderful it must've been to see our fellow forum buddies in the flesh. To feel their energy...see their accepting smiles and to bond with them on such a deep and meaningful level...I applaude your courage and hope one day you and I too can meet. You've been a dear to me on the forum and before this horrid storm...now I feel an even deeper bond with you. Even in cyber space...I'm glad we met.

Bucko and Bitches ...what a fabulous thing to invite Herman as a guest blogger...I take my hat off to all three of you....Bravo!!! I too hope we three can meet sometime too...I can't imagine the mischief and mayhem we could get into...

 
At Fri Sep 16, 02:06:00 AM GMT+10, Anonymous Steven said...

Bravo ! Bravo!
It was a joy to read Hermans blog.
I hope you encourage him to do more in the future. His hope, his courage brightens up a life.

 
At Sat Sep 17, 04:25:00 AM GMT+10, Blogger Bucko said...

Davie-

This prooves once and for all that we do have hearts, albeit teeny-tiny black things. Hermie is a dear sweet friend and it was my honor to publish his feelings.

Steven-

Hermie has a way witn words that cuts through the bullshit and warms places other than the usual suspects around these parts.

Bisous-
B

 
At Sat Sep 03, 03:55:00 AM GMT+10, Blogger Sherin Simon said...

up board result 2017
bihar board result 2017
rbse result 2017
hsc result 2017
kerala hse result 2017
sslc result 2017
aipgmee 2017 results
10th result 2017
12th result 2017
ibps po result 2016
ignou result 2016
survivor series 2016 results
night of champions 2016 results
tlc 2016 results
hell in a cell 2016 results
spiderman homecoming
iphone 7 price in india
Merry Christmas Wishes
pnr status
birthday wishes
sslc result 2017 kerala
sslc result 2017 karnataka up board result 2017
bihar board result 2017
rbse result 2017
hsc result 2017
kerala hse result 2017
sslc result 2017
aipgmee 2017 results
10th result 2017
12th result 2017
ibps po result 2016
ignou result 2016
survivor series 2016 results
night of champions 2016 results
tlc 2016 results
hell in a cell 2016 results
spiderman homecoming
iphone 7 price in india
Merry Christmas Wishes
pnr status
birthday wishes
sslc result 2017 kerala
sslc result 2017 karnataka

 
At Wed Dec 28, 05:01:00 PM GMT+11, Blogger Ujawal Singh said...

CBSE 12th Science Result 2017
RBSE 10th Result 2017

 
At Fri Jan 06, 09:54:00 PM GMT+11, Blogger Priya Sharma said...

Bihar 10th Result 2017
Bihar 12th Result 2017
CTET Result 2017
Rose Day Images 2017

 
At Wed Apr 26, 03:05:00 PM GMT+10, Blogger Akshay said...

Mother’s Day is celebrated for our family most special person our mother. Mother is a god gift for all people in the world. Every son/daughter is celebrated Mother’s Day for their mother; they express their feelings, love, and joy with their mom. Mother’s Day is celebrated in all over the world on different days; it means Mothers Day Date is not same in all over the world. In most countries, Mother’s Day is celebrated second Sunday wishesQuotes of month May. Mother’s Day was first celebrated in 1908 when Anna Jarvis held a memorial for her mother at St Andrew’s Methodist Church in Grafton, West Virginia. St Andrew’s Methodist Church now holds the International Mother’s Day Shrine.

 
At Sun May 07, 06:27:00 AM GMT+10, Blogger Arif Hossen said...


Mothers day gifts 2017

Mothers day gifts 2017 are a perfect way to show your love for Mom.

mothers day gifts
Mothers day gifts
Happy Mother's day gifts
Happy Mothers Day 2017
Happy Mothers Day quotes
Mothers day 2017
Mothers Day 2017
Mothers Day Gifts Ideas
Mother's day gifts 2017
Mothers day gifts
MOTHER'S DAY GIFTS Ideas 2017


Happy Mothers Day gifts 2017 quotes Images Wallpapers

mother's day
Happy mothers day 2017
Mother's day 2017
Mothers day gifts
Mothers day gifts 2017
Mothers day quotes 2017
Happy mothers day quotes 2017
Mothers day images
Happy mothers day images 2017
mothers day poems 2017
mothers day cards2017
happy mothers day images 2017
Memorial Day 2017


Mothers Day 2017 Images Wallpapers


Mothers Day 2017 Pictures

Mothers Day 2017

Best Happy Mothers Day 2017 Quotes

Happy Mothers Day 2017 Quotes

Happy Mothers Day 2017 cards

mothers day gifts

mother's day gifts
happy mothers day quotes 2017

Cheap Mother's Day Flowers 2017

Mother's Day Brunch 2017 Recipes Ideas


http://www.mothersday2017.co/
http://www.memorialday2017.co/

 
At Sun Jun 25, 05:10:00 AM GMT+10, Blogger Priya Ghosh said...

kissanime mobile
kiss cartoon mobile
kissanime apk
anime kiss mobile
kissanime app download
4th of july images
happy 4th of july images
fourth of july images
4th of july clipart


 
At Thu Sep 21, 05:26:00 AM GMT+10, Blogger Entertainment Fan Club said...

The LEGO Ninjago Movie 2017

Watch The LEGO Ninjago 2017 Full Movie Watch or Download Online.

The LEGO Ninjago Movie Watch Online

The LEGO Ninjago Movie is a 2017 American animation-action, adventure film directed by Charlie Bean, Paul Fisher and written by Hilary Winston, with a story by Bob Logan.We start the week with news of that genre that likes big boys. Yes, the animation! It is that Warner Bros. Pictures revealed NINE posters of the LEGO® NINJAGO® Movie characters, a film by the same team that built “The LEGO Movie” and ” LEGO Batman: The Movie “(The LEGO Batman Movie). Do not miss out!

The LEGO Ninjago Movie 2017
The LEGO Ninjago Movie Watch Online
The LEGO Ninjago Movie
The LEGO Ninjago Movie 2017
Watch The LEGO Ninjago Movie Online
The LEGO Ninjago Movie full Online
The LEGO Ninjago full Movie 2017 Online
The LEGO Ninjago full Movie 2017 Online
Watch The LEGO Ninjago full Movie 2017
LEGO Ninjago 2017 Full Movie

The film The LEGO Ninjago Movie: Warner Bros. Interactive and TT Games have announced the launch of LEGO Ninjago Movie – The Video Game for PlayStation 4, Xbox One, Nintendo Switch and PC on September 26. In it, players will be able to immerse themselves in the world of the new animated adventure for the big screen: The LEGO Ninjago Movie.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home